5 Tips for a Relaxed Couple Shoot — Even If You Feel Awkward in Front of the Camera

Short answer first: a relaxed couple shoot depends less on being naturally photogenic and more on five things you can sort out beforehand — the right outfit, a photographer you genuinely click with, clear communication, permission to pause, and remembering that you're really just spending time together. I hear "we're honestly terrible at this" from almost every couple who writes to me first — and almost everyone feels that way at the start. Here are my five most important tips, gathered from many, many shoots.

1. Wear an outfit you genuinely feel good in

Sounds obvious, but it's the biggest lever there is. If your clothes feel wrong — too tight, too unfamiliar, too much "not you" — it shows in every single photo. You'll stand differently, smile differently, breathe differently. So wear something you feel at home in, even if that's "just" jeans and a nice jumper. Real beats perfectly styled, every time.

I see this again and again: the moment a couple arrives in their own, familiar clothes instead of something bought specially for the occasion, their whole body language changes. Shoulders drop, movement gets more natural. If you're unsure what works well together, take a look at my separate outfit guide — I go into more detail there on colours and fabrics.

2. Choose a photographer you genuinely feel good about

Honestly, this matters more than almost everything else on this list. When there's good chemistry between you and the person behind the camera from the start, everything else tends to sort itself out. Look at real work before booking, have a proper get-to-know-you chat, trust your gut. That's why I always offer a relaxed first conversation before anything is booked — no form, just a normal chat.

You'll usually sense in that first exchange whether the tone is right. Does it feel more like an interview, or like talking to someone you'd enjoy spending time with anyway? That feeling is exactly what decides, on the day itself, whether you can let go or stay quietly tense.

3. Tell me exactly what you have in mind, beforehand

If you have concrete ideas — a specific place, a certain feeling, a Pinterest photo you can't stop thinking about — send it to me ahead of time. That way we're all pulling in the same direction, and on the day itself you don't need to explain anything, you can just show up. Without any input from you I can only guess; with it, we hit exactly your taste.

This goes for anything you're uncomfortable with too: if a certain pose or location is off the table for you, just say so plainly. The better I know your boundaries beforehand, the more you can relax during the shoot, trusting nothing unexpected will come up.

4. Take a short break if it's just not clicking

Sometimes a smile just won't sit right, or you notice you're thinking more about the camera than about each other. That's completely normal — just say so. We grab a quick drink, talk about something else entirely, laugh about the slightly awkward moment. After a minute, things usually look completely different.

I never push through moments like that — I deliberately lower the camera instead. Often the loveliest photos happen right after a break like this, simply because the tension has left and you're back with each other instead of worrying about how you look.

5. Enjoy the moment with your partner — it's a date that happens to have a camera along

This is my most important tip of all: forget I'm even there. Talk to each other, not to me. Make the inside jokes you'd make anyway. Hold each other the way you normally would. The photos that end up moving people most almost never happen when both of you are consciously "posing" — they happen the moment you briefly forget you're being photographed at all.

So think of the shoot less as an appointment and more as an afternoon together that just happens to be documented. That one shift in mindset alone usually makes the biggest difference between tense photos and genuinely alive ones.

Related: Outfit guide for your photo shoot

– Hannah